And just like that, a woman is throwing herself at me with offers of fulfilling my most hidden sexual desires. She even texted me graphic pictures of herself to entice me into coming over to spend the night.
My mind raced. All my male hormones and testosterone kicked into high gear. Flashing through my imagination was all of the things I would do. It was an offer that was too good to be true!
Then the breaks went on.
You would think that I would jump at the chance.
All I could think about was how much I wasn’t really interested in her offer. My stomach churned thinking of being that intimate with someone other than the woman I seem to have lost my head over.
Not that I have been much for casual sex since I grew out of the silly thinking that casual sex was casual.
I don’t want it anymore. I don’t want a meaningless relationship. I am so tired of relating to women on a simple and pseudo safe level. I want to bond with someone. I want to share my real thoughts and my raw feelings. I want to be truly safe.
Isn’t that what most folks want?
Am I alone in this?
I can’t be.
You want it too don’t you? You want to be in a relationship with someone that really knows who you are. You want to connect at a level that allows for true intimacy… that intimacy that doesn’t involve sex. Intimacy that is between two people able to feel together and think together, laugh together and cry together; Intimacy that comes from being safe enough to be completely honest about your innermost everything.
If you, or I, or anyone could experience even a decent degree of that, wouldn’t it be worth the risk of getting hurt?
Casual sex… Not for me. It’s just too easy.
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